How Far Into The Lifestyle Are You?

Dementyia

Kink Talk Member
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May 14, 2008
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In reality, most people who say they are "into" BDSM in any of it's forms aren't into the lifestyle, but are instead into BDSM play, where a part of their life, a part of their day or week is BDSM.

Those who are truly into the lifestyle live it, day in and day out. It is as constant as the need to eat or sleep, and an integral part of their existence.

It all depends on what aspect(s) of the lifestyle one practices, how deep the rabbit hole goes, as it were, in any individual's life.

We are all different, and those differences are what make the BDSM community the varied and beautiful thing that it is.

So my question is, how far down the rabbit hole are you? Do you live the lifestyle as a natural part of your daily life, or is BDSM a little spice that you add to your daily, weekly, or monthly routine of otherwise outwardly pretending to be vanilla?
 

Strawberry

2
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Nov 21, 2007
38
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In my house
Im on a long distance relation ship. But other than that, I'm far into the hole.. Day in and day out I dream of nothing but being his, and serving him forever. I see it as more important than friends, school, work and all that. It's a huge part of who I am.
 

SubMissChievous

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Jan 9, 2008
316
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Right now I'm as deep in the hole as I've ever been. If I look only into my rules from the moment I get up from bed in the morning up until I go to sleep at night lots of what I do is related in some way to my submission. This is something I progressed into with time because it was just last year after having experimenting different things both in RL & online I found out that was the way I needed it to be. But the reason why I want it to be as much a big part of my life as possible is not really so I can say that I'm "truly into the lifestyle" or a "true sub/slave". It's rather about having a feeling of security about it You could say that the rules & rituals that I do every day are kind of the outline of my submission. I need to have them so all the rest of what I do whether it is tasks or orders from my Master have a bigger meaning. The fact that I want to have things included into my daily life such as having my clothes chosen for me when I go to work or having to sleep bound is because it sort of permanently reminds me about my submission as well as it?s also a sign of my commitment as a slave.
 
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odineu

Kinky Newbie
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May 18, 2008
16
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37
Starring at the entrance...

I am not even really starting out but the "fetish" and "thought" of it is starting to really grow on me.
I haven't experienced it yet but from what I think... it will be a way too... just completely submit for once, which I have never done.
I am very curious to start with it, only certain things... but being bound and not being able to help my situation would probably help me out in many ways, even my personality.

So yes, I have no clue about BDSM or S&M... but I am staring at the entrance and damn does it seem tempting!:p
 

aika

Senior Kink Talk Member
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May 20, 2008
104
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England
Not very far. Me and my girlfriend tie each other up, and that's about as far as it goes really. Most of the kink is fantasy to me, I don't think that living a complete BDSM "lifestyle" is for me.
 

TensionRoom101

Kink Talk Member
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I am part of the team that runs Tension fetish club in Newcastle. I am also part of the team that runs The Dungeon Club in Dudley (west midlands) and the new post BBB club Unleashed (Birmingham).

I occasionally help Pamela's Playroom in the manufacture of floggers and BDSM furniture, and man the stall at the BBB.

I attend Violate (Glasgow) and Scarlet (Birmingham) as often as I can.

I have girls around to play at mine at least once a week, sometimes more.

That's quite involved.


Mike
 

stephpoet

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May 25, 2008
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I'm in pretty deep. My Master is moving in this week and will be controlling pretty much everything, more so than he has been. Not to mention I have a few subs and doms in my life, and the Munches.
 

boundperil

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May 12, 2008
57
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8
Mine is an online relationship. I do not control her everyday events, but sexually she is mine to play with. We play everyday, I know she can't go long with out me, as I her. But there is more to it then just the sexually end of things, I help her in her day to day life with problems she is going through.
 

marth

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Jun 30, 2008
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I'm just watching the rabbits having so much fun in holes... from afar.

I've had a few online relationships, but as a dom it can get pretty onesided easily. I'm looking to explore more though
 

BeenThereDoneThat

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Jul 22, 2008
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I'm definately more of occasional visitor than a resident of the BDSM lifestyle. For me, it's more of a kink that sometimes appeals to me more than other times -- it kind of depends on my mood that day.
 

willyable

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Aug 1, 2008
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I haven't gotten to the point where I live it day in and day out but I do it at least once a night. I practice it once just not througout the whole entire day. I think eventually I will get there just not there yet.
 

deeperblue

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Aug 10, 2008
12
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Chicago
Since I'm actively visiting fetish and play partys and attend on group meetings I'm pretty much involved in the 'Lifestyle'.
 

devilsown

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Oct 29, 2008
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I guess I am one of those who would fall into the description of BDSM play for now. I have had a keen interest in it for many years, but never met someone who I could actually experience it with in real time. Perhaps that will change.
 

Master_ofpain

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Jan 12, 2008
37
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i am, into a whole mess of bdsm lifestyle, i dont go to any clubs or anything but other then work, my life has contact with bdsm every day.
 

Dementyia

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May 14, 2008
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Tat's very revealing, and I find it pleasant to know that there are so many levels of involvement in the lifestyle here. Thanks everyone for sharing. *smile*
 

Saxon

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Dec 18, 2008
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I personally have been activly engaging in "the lifestyle" since March,investigating and slowly getting involved. Now in December I have a loving girlfriend who loves my kinks as much as I do, as well as a small, yet solid amount of BDSM and fetish kit. We play when the mood takes us, neither fully interested in 24/7 roleplay, and thats enough for us. That does not mean, however, we ain't interested in getting kinkier, by all means bring it, but slow and steady is good for us.
 

slaveslut

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Dec 16, 2008
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i used to be down the rabbit a good bit . for about a year . for the first few weeks of the relationship it was very vanilla and then she let me in on the fact that she was looking for a slave . up until that point i had no experience of anything but vanilla sex but over the space of a month or so it was what i came to need . she was a cruel mistress and tought me alot . for a few months i lived with her in a 24/7 full control relationship . it is because of her that i have a huge rubber and bdsm fetish but unfortunatly she left me and moved away i have no contact with her any more . i am currently looking for a life stile mistress
 

always.

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Dec 29, 2008
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I have a slave; but it's long distance so we cant take it much farther at this point.. I wouldn't go out looking for a new slave in my area so that I can take it farther in my lifestyle, I am quite happy with my slave & content on waiting until things may fall into place for us; Even though it is only over the internet, We've been talking for 3 years.. he knows things about me that no one else does & I consider him a very important part of my life.
 

cfnm_patient

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Jan 1, 2009
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I think this can mean different things depending on who you are.

Right now I can't say I'm in it 24/7 as I've no sub or switch partner. But I've been there and done that. I also can't get the want for another D/s relationship out of my mind either.
 

Ivan

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Apr 11, 2009
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Actually, I have never even thought of how to define how far gone I may be. This is probably because I do not like to categorize things.
 

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