Need some advice

indian_slut

Senior Kink Talk Member
  • Bisexual
  • Female
  • Slave
Sep 21, 2015
163
12
18
Hi,

I just need some advice, because I have been told that I am not a sub and don't understand Dom-sub relation. And I am trying to figure it out.
- I enjoy humiliation, but I have limits.
- I enjoy random tasks from strangers
- I sometimes modify the tasks to make them more interesting (sometimes)
- I do respect people's time and try to respond whenever I am online
- I don't entertain PM because I feel if I have posted a public link that everyone should enjoy the updates and PMs kinda ruin the continuity, so I want all the talking to be done on thread.
- I would love to have one master but I don't want to or feel like that I should talk to that person anything other than punishments and tasks, if we talk(some friendly talk like anything like questions about my life, why I have a particular kink etc) than it kind of ruins it for me and I can't behave as a sub for him any more.

Anyone else feel this way?


This may be not relevant in thread, but I couldn't figure out where should I post this please move it if needed.

Thanks,
Slut
 

Destruction

Senior Kink Talk Member
  • Bisexual
  • Male
  • Dominant
Aug 13, 2016
155
33
28
Here are my opinions regarding it:
- I enjoy humiliation, but I have limits- Most of the persons have their limits and I think the most can be replaced by All
- I enjoy random tasks from strangers - Many do so
- I sometimes modify the tasks to make them more interesting (sometimes)- Actually this is a good habit, this helps the other person (dare giver) learn something interesting as perhaps he/she may have never done the dares given to you
- I do respect people's time and try to respond whenever I am online - Essential and nice gesture
- I don't entertain PM because I feel if I have posted a public link that everyone should enjoy the updates and PMs kinda ruin the continuity, so I want all the talking to be done on thread. This mean you like to be a part of public discussion
- I would love to have one master but I don't want to or feel like that I should talk to that person anything other than punishments and tasks, if we talk(some friendly talk like anything like questions about my life, why I have a particular kink etc) than it kind of ruins it for me and I can't behave as a sub for him any more. - I had a sub with this kind of behavior, but I found her always kinky to do dares
 

shadowice0823

Distinguished Member
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Dominant
Aug 9, 2012
318
24
18
I will just reply under your questions rather then all at once so I dont miss any.

- I enjoy humiliation, but I have limits.
sounds like a common sub thing to me. Sure people love stuff but sometimes it goes to far this is what safe words are for when it becomes over whelming they should realize that and back off maybe talk about it figure out what went wrong and then proceed accordingly.

- I enjoy random tasks from strangers
Again this isnt all that uncommon. If you have a dom just talk it over with them beforehand to make sure its okay. Most of us wont mind we will just expect the report as well and to okay it beforehand and make changes as needed if we dont like something.

- I sometimes modify the tasks to make them more interesting (sometimes)
Most people posting the dares don't mind, if this point has come up multiple times just double check with the person that created if you can make the change and let them know why. I have ran into this before and normally its not a big deal at all, I like my dares to be perfect.

- I do respect people's time and try to respond whenever I am online
This one is a touchy issue, guys deal with lots of ghosts on the forums. In that girls just randomly disappear or never respond and it does feel a lot like wasted time. If they put some effort in just try to return the favor is all.

- I don't entertain PM because I feel if I have posted a public link that everyone should enjoy the updates and PMs kinda ruin the continuity, so I want all the talking to be done on thread.
I personally like private more when giving out dares for 1 big reason. I have seen my dares ripped off plenty of times. I am a tad flattered and mostly upset as a result. When someone copies my dare word for word and sends to another girl then she thinks its his and I am cheated out of a report I would have otherwise gotten and she thinks hes pretty creative. I don't mind a report being posted or blogged for the public but this is one reason I do pm a lot of my dares anymore.

- I would love to have one master but I don't want to or feel like that I should talk to that person anything other than punishments and tasks, if we talk(some friendly talk like anything like questions about my life, why I have a particular kink etc) than it kind of ruins it for me and I can't behave as a sub for him any more.
I do feel like you are missing a big part of it not wanting to chat with your master, but just state it up front if that's the kind of relationship you want. I like to get to know the girls normal and kink sides personally but there's someone out there for everyone


Best of luck finding what you are looking for, don't settle and keep hunting until you find the perfect person.
 

Magical Trapdoor

Kinky Newbie
  • Bisexual
  • Trans
  • Submissive
Apr 2, 2016
20
2
0
Darling,

If you call yourself a sub, then you're a sub.
The world of BDSM isn't black and white, there is no one single right way to do anything.

It sounds like it's very much your accuser who doesn't understand Dom/sub relationships.
Each one is different, there's a reason people are called individuals ;)
Ultimately, so long as the people involved are happy with the arrangement, then you're doing great.

And if one or the other disagrees with how it should be, well there's always other people.

You'll meet a lot of guys who will try and tell you that you're wrong, and that they should teach you how to be you on here sadly, just ignore them and move on ^.^
 

Doctor Pervert

Retired
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Private
May 19, 2013
3,508
4,731
483
Hi,
I just need some advice, because I have been told that I am not a sub and don't understand Dom-sub relation. And I am trying to figure it out.

Who told you that you're not a sub? From what I've seen of the stuff you've posted you most certainly are.
This isn't the first time I've heard this, just a few days ago another sub complained to me that a certain supposed Dom here had told her the same thing.
Just because you don't bow down to some little piss ant upstart that calls himself a Dom simply because he selected "Dominant" when he signed up here does not mean you're not submissive.
You can be very much a submissive without having to have a single Dom to submit to. Being submissive doesn't mean you just do what anyone says any time.
You have performed many tasks for different people in the time you've been active here and provided some lovely albums as proof of your work. Keep going as you are and enjoy the ride!
 

dearelliot

Senior Kink Talk Member
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Switch
Aug 25, 2016
101
40
28
different ideas

Over the years Ive met a few Doms who want a real sub, which means a slave. Sometimes they want the slave to be very involved in non sexual things, like giving them money, Cleaning their house and working for them for free...sound good, ?
Well I don't know how many slaves like that are around but if that's what someone wants and they find it, good for them.
 

nsubmellow

Kinky Newbie
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Submissive
Jan 5, 2015
20
0
3
Germany
Over the years Ive met a few Doms who want a real sub, which means a slave. Sometimes they want the slave to be very involved in non sexual things, like giving them money, Cleaning their house and working for them for free...sound good, ?
Well I don't know how many slaves like that are around but if that's what someone wants and they find it, good for them.


Man, a real sub and a sub are totaly the same. A slave and a sub are diffrent.
You can be a real sub with out beeing a slave. Please even slaves dont give others money and stuff they might clean your house and do stuff to simple your life. But the dom still have to care for the sub or slave. Either way the dom is the one looking for the sub/slave. Everything els is simple abusment, of people not know what BDSM is about.
 

Nwbie

Kinky Newbie
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Switch
Nov 6, 2013
2
0
1
As said before, you are a sub.

Talking about your life kinda confuses me and I don't know to what extent it annoys you. Let me explain when I give people tasks I'll ask them things like how do you go to school/uni/work, where do you live, who are loving with you and how old are they. All stuff I'll want to know to see where and if I can push someone. My problem with subs is that they often get scared (I like semipublic or public dates) and then get narrow minded. At that point they lack all creativity and that's a space which I find annoying, so I set up dares in such a way to make them think out of the box (when I can and think of something good only).
Because if they would interpret it in any normal way then they would never do these dares.
However to do that I need to know stuff about the person's live and what the risk is.

Just wanted to let you know why some doms might want to talk and know some stuff about you personal life.

You could always have a Kik group with 1 or 2 main moderators/masters and have more people join invited by you or the master (s).
Much more dare focused and the for the online exposure you can create a blog or post on kinktalk.
 

Dom6BDSM

Senior Kink Talk Member
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Dominant
Mar 24, 2011
156
7
18
North Europe
Its not uncommon for manipulators to claim a sub is not a true sub if they don't do that or that. They use it to press people to do actions they are not really want to do.

I recommend that anyone stay far away from those kind of people who abuse people that way.
 

Featured Threads

New Personals