Is there such thing as love in a D/S relationship...?

D: I'm shocked!

I love my Master to pieces!
Besides, trust and love are so close together.
And how could you possibly dedicate yourself to someone you don't trust?
I might be full of myself but I deem myself too good to obey someone I don't love.

If you ask me, there is definately love.
She's been watching too much hentai.

Edit; How can 10 people view this thread without posting their opinion on it D:

Well, I am really sorry for you dude honestly I really am. But you do have to realize it would be really confusing to raise kids in that type of enviornment. But as far as love goes, well hell no there can be love everywhere. If she is completly sub then she does things for you because she loves to please you she can love you, and you can still show you love her as a master yourself. I have done it in many occasions. But as for raising children you can still have it but it will have to be a secret from them. They will go on unjudging until they have turned into teenagers however,you can still keep the lifestyle going but it turns more into the "late night" type of thing. But I hope everything works out as well for you I give you the best of wishes.

Ive been traveling for over 15 hours and am dealing with time zone changes and culture shock, so I will put my input in on the love thing later, but I just have to say that in terms of kids I'm going to post one question:

Why do your kids need to know about your sex life?

Yes, in Ds there is also the power exchange dynamic, but to kids that will just be how mommy and daddy run the house.

*Ill edit this tomorrow when Im more coherent"

do not worry master, i know there is love and trust already in our relationship otherwise i wouldnt still be here. All that matters is that we know there is love...no one elses opinion matters but our own. i thank the goddess that i found you, youre the best and kindest master Ive ever had....
and as for kids, i think that as long as they dont witness anything sexual then they will just assume that they have a normal house hold in which their daddy is the boss...

I genuinely don't understand where she's coming from. Seriously; how can a person *have* a D/s relationship without turst, love and complete honesty? It just doesn't work otherwise. She obviously doesn't have the first idea about what D/s even is :-/

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees stupid to even ask lol

I believe it is possibleto achieve love in a D/s relationship. Affection can be felt for anything, I know it's not the same but if we are unable to have love, especially in D/s relationships

First off, love is in the air and the air is everywhere.

Secondly, I would never let my kids in on any sort of D/s relationship my wife and I had, I wouldn't for a second want them to misinterpret the situation and believe that males were superior to females. When it comes to kids I believe that D/s relationships should be kept strictly to the bedroom and when the two of you are alone, otherwise it could effect a kids psyche.

Such a stupid question that whenever i see this thread has come up i want to should 'of course if fucking is'

Excuse the language.

However, i see that many people have already done just that.

So maybe a better question would be better reversed. 'Is it possible to sustain a D/s relationship without love?'

To which the answer should be no no no no nono nono no no no no no.

Cause if you're in a relationhip where you're getting beat and your getting told to do stuff and other D/s thigns, i'd say that perhaps it's not a D/s relationship at all, but rather an abusive one.

This thread is seriously hilarious!

I have debated whether I wanted to reply to this thread... I'm reading this with a huge grin on my face right now...

The question is not even if there's such a thing as love in a D/s relationship or not or if a relationship can sustain without love... Seriously, is there a one-fit-all way of doing things that I don't know of yet? Please, if there is, let me know...

I'm not gonna be so obnoxious and full of myself as to dare call the question stupid. The only stupid questions are the ones that are not asked.

As far as I know, one good way to make a relationship work is that both partners get what they need out of it. Whatever that is. I know some couples who are very loving and happy. I know some who love themselves and are miserable still (yeah, surprised uh?) And there are people who are very happy with getting anything else out of it. Even if it's just sex. Oh and not all these couples are into an abusive relationship or getting beat and told to do things or whatever... A lot of people can be in a respectful and harmonious relationship without it being a "loving" one.

Seriously... there's no way that is more "right" to have a healthy D/s relationship and that includes emotions. As far as both persons get what they need out of it I don't think anyone as any business judging. What is unconceivable for one can be all natural for another.


Oh and to answer the OP: yes, of course, it's possible

I don't think anyone was judging anyone. I don't think anything can be classed as a relationship if there are not emotions envolved either. Friendships have emotions envolved even if it's not love. Yes you can have a D/s relationship without love but if either person does't care about the other in any way then it's not a relationship in my opinion. If there are no emotions of any kind, not even friendship or respect you might as well take orders from a machine.

I also think it's pretty rude to laugh at others views, but that is just my opinion.

I'm not reading the other posts so if I repeat something somebody already said sorry. My personal experience, even though I've only been a master for 2 and a half months now is that there has to be love in a d/s or m/s relationship. The key word in that phrase is relationship. If there's no love and the master is solely about pain and control, I would not expect that relationship to last a long time. Sure I have given my slave some painful commands, and sometimes very rarely control her, she can second me on that. But I love her and I try to make sure that I tell her that every day. Our relationship may have command in it but trust and love is mainly what our relationship is based off of. The only reason she goes with some of my commands that can be painful is because she loves me and she wants to please me. In the same case, just this past Monday we did a role reversal where she was the mistress and I was the slave, and she really worked me over. She gave me some really painful commands but I endured them because I love her and I wanted to please her.
On the side of dominants, we need to care for our subs as well. I am very lenient with my sub, which is not to say I'm soft, as I respect her limits, make the commands a whole lot easier than they could be and respect some of her requests. A sub needs to feel safe, secure, tusted, and loved by their dominant and if they don't have that feeling, well I think it may be some fault on the dominants part. A common misconception of a d/s relationship is that there is no love whatsoever, but that's not true and people need to realize that.

I think the person who claimed there is't love in a D/s relationship was confusing a D/s relationship with an abusive relationship. Obviously, to us anyway, there are important differneces. Consent, for example.

And I agree with what other people posted here, why would the kids know about your sex life? I suppose raising kids in a house where there's 24/7 D/s dynamic in effect would be weird. Probably not altogether healthy. But in most relationships (that I know of) where the master & slave stuff is kept in the bedroom, no one else (especially kids) needs to know about it.

PaddleFan said:

I think the person who claimed there is't love in a D/s relationship was confusing a D/s relationship with an abusive relationship. Obviously, to us anyway, there are important differneces. Consent, for example.

And I agree with what other people posted here, why would the kids know about your sex life? I suppose raising kids in a house where there's 24/7 D/s dynamic in effect would be weird. Probably not altogether healthy. But in most relationships (that I know of) where the master & slave stuff is kept in the bedroom, no one else (especially kids) needs to know about it.

Click to expand...

Nailed it right there.

I think there has to be love involved in a sustainable D/s or M/s kind of relationship. Now, does it have to be the kind of love that leads to marriage? Not necessarily. But there is love there. Because trust is necessary. Trust is a form of love IMO, and I don't know anyone that would submit to someone they didn't trust.

goood question and i agree with most people here, i would say it all depends on how the realtionship started. If it started as a M/S secnario then it defenite can lead to love and i have know some couples who are deeply in love and practice M/S alot.

I think its love of what you do, speaking as amaster i love controlling orgasm's the pleasure of my slave, punishing if need be. If you don`t love it and i would say RESPECT your slave then you are in trouble and this is when trouble starts.

The longest slave i had was 6 months and it was a realtionshop before hand, and i did love her in the normal way. Due to a love triangle developing we had to split and i don`t regret the time we spent and think back of the fun we had with a big smile on my face.

I love my wife very deeply. The D/s shit is fun, it's sexy and it bolsters us both emotionally. A better question would be "What about a D/s relationship makes you think there can't be love?"

All relationships have some love tied to them. Even a friendly relationship. I used to love my best friend to pieces, ( until she turned her back on me because i was living my life the way I wanted to ).
To me a D/s relationship is all about love and trust.

Trust: you trust them enough to not hurt you and stop when you say the safeword.

Love: It happens when you're being that intimate with another person.They find out about all the places that give you pleasure.

I love my Master and would do anything to be by his side and serving him. <3