I am having a serious problem dealing with the loss of my sub. She became so much more than that, she was perfect for me, my twin flame.
I do not use the word love lightly. In my entire life I have used it in regards to only two women (not family). I love this woman! As much as I love her she loves me! She needs me, with me her life was whole, complete. Without me she has broken her greatest promise to herself, she has questioned her will to live.
She had to leave me. Thank god she was strong enough to because with all the strength I have, and I possess more than most men can fathom, I would not have been strong enough to leave her. She is my addiction.
The twist is I have a family. Wife and three kids. Three kids that I made my most iron clad promise to. To always be there, to raise them each and everyday, to put them to bed and rise with them. Even for the most perfect woman who will ever be in my life I will not break my promise to them, they are innocent and deserve everything good life has to offer.
My Pet and I spent large amounts of time together (more waking time than I was spending with my wife) but in the end I would always have to leave her alone. I hated it every time I left her and she broke into pieces without me there to hold her together. We became dependent on each other.
We now have no contact, cold turkey complete separation. Blocked from phones, social media etc. But we still live minutes away from each other, I still drive by just to see her house! I do not cry, now I can't stop. I am an eternal optimist, now I fear my optimistic nature is fading away.
I see countless articles and advice for subs who lose their Dom. But what about that rare Dom who loses not only his Sub but his twin flame? How do I deal with this, the worst loss of my life?
I do not use the word love lightly. In my entire life I have used it in regards to only two women (not family). I love this woman! As much as I love her she loves me! She needs me, with me her life was whole, complete. Without me she has broken her greatest promise to herself, she has questioned her will to live.
She had to leave me. Thank god she was strong enough to because with all the strength I have, and I possess more than most men can fathom, I would not have been strong enough to leave her. She is my addiction.
The twist is I have a family. Wife and three kids. Three kids that I made my most iron clad promise to. To always be there, to raise them each and everyday, to put them to bed and rise with them. Even for the most perfect woman who will ever be in my life I will not break my promise to them, they are innocent and deserve everything good life has to offer.
My Pet and I spent large amounts of time together (more waking time than I was spending with my wife) but in the end I would always have to leave her alone. I hated it every time I left her and she broke into pieces without me there to hold her together. We became dependent on each other.
We now have no contact, cold turkey complete separation. Blocked from phones, social media etc. But we still live minutes away from each other, I still drive by just to see her house! I do not cry, now I can't stop. I am an eternal optimist, now I fear my optimistic nature is fading away.
I see countless articles and advice for subs who lose their Dom. But what about that rare Dom who loses not only his Sub but his twin flame? How do I deal with this, the worst loss of my life?
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