Vanilla sex is not enough, I wanna be a slave

Camille1981

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Dec 23, 2015
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Hi,
I've been vanilla all my life but now I guess it is time to join the "dark" side :p
Never had any bdsm relationship whatsoever, but some time ago, blame a famous movie, I started to think about kinky stuff. My fantasy is to be a sex slave, but I don't know how and where to start. I tried some dating site but I don't think that it is the best option to find new sex parters. Need help please! All help is welcome.
Thanks
 
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whiterose

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May 27, 2013
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haha, films can do that some times, although I had some strange fascination with Cat Woman and Bat Girl when I was very young, it was this that really sparked my interest when I was (almost) grown up: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0073589/)

It was pretty old already when I first saw it, on VHS ;)
 
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HarmlessBeast

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Jan 7, 2015
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Edmonton
OK, saw a lot in your short message. I'll try to sort it out.

You say you have been vanilla, but have started to "THINK" about kink. Then you say your "FANTASY" is to be a sex slave.

first: going from vanilla to sex slave is like going from being a couch potato to challenging Bolt to a sprint or trying to run the boston marathon.

so, things you need to consider: are you in a relationship now? if so, have you talked to them about this? Do you know if these are just fantasies, or do you really want to act on these fantasies?

Then your next step might be to go to local munches. Meet people in your area in a non play environment and then use them as a resource.

As for finding sex partners? DON'T. Research BDSM Safety. Learn how to safely negotiate within a BDSM context. Get to know people in the BDSM community and get references from them. BDSM can be dangerous if done incorrectly, so looking for sex partners before learning how to protect your self emotionally and physically is like getting behind the steering wheel of a formula 1 racer and taking off at 200 MPH without proper equipment or even knowing how to drive a normal car.

So take your time and don't be in a hurry to jump without looking
 

Camille1981

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Dec 23, 2015
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OK, saw a lot in your short message. I'll try to sort it out.

You say you have been vanilla, but have started to "THINK" about kink. Then you say your "FANTASY" is to be a sex slave.

first: going from vanilla to sex slave is like going from being a couch potato to challenging Bolt to a sprint or trying to run the boston marathon.

so, things you need to consider: are you in a relationship now? if so, have you talked to them about this? Do you know if these are just fantasies, or do you really want to act on these fantasies?

Then your next step might be to go to local munches. Meet people in your area in a non play environment and then use them as a resource.

As for finding sex partners? DON'T. Research BDSM Safety. Learn how to safely negotiate within a BDSM context. Get to know people in the BDSM community and get references from them. BDSM can be dangerous if done incorrectly, so looking for sex partners before learning how to protect your self emotionally and physically is like getting behind the steering wheel of a formula 1 racer and taking off at 200 MPH without proper equipment or even knowing how to drive a normal car.

So take your time and don't be in a hurry to jump without looking

Thanks for your advice and wise words!
 
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MasterMichaelNY

Senior Kink Talk Member
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Dec 19, 2015
128
2
18
New York
Look up Fet Life on the net, join it' go to your local munchies , as pointed above,learn to crawl first before you start to run.
 

andrei

<:: Verified ::>
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Jan 9, 2008
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OK, saw a lot in your short message. I'll try to sort it out.

You say you have been vanilla, but have started to "THINK" about kink. Then you say your "FANTASY" is to be a sex slave.

first: going from vanilla to sex slave is like going from being a couch potato to challenging Bolt to a sprint or trying to run the boston marathon.

so, things you need to consider: are you in a relationship now? if so, have you talked to them about this? Do you know if these are just fantasies, or do you really want to act on these fantasies?

Then your next step might be to go to local munches. Meet people in your area in a non play environment and then use them as a resource.

As for finding sex partners? DON'T. Research BDSM Safety. Learn how to safely negotiate within a BDSM context. Get to know people in the BDSM community and get references from them. BDSM can be dangerous if done incorrectly, so looking for sex partners before learning how to protect your self emotionally and physically is like getting behind the steering wheel of a formula 1 racer and taking off at 200 MPH without proper equipment or even knowing how to drive a normal car.

So take your time and don't be in a hurry to jump without looking


Your advice is very welcome.
I would like to add something: Not slave but some are just looking to be just submissive after years of vanilla. The vanilla partner doesnt quite understand the bdsm desires. But all your fantasy goes strict to submission, not slavery etc which is another topic.
 

fairtitania

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Mar 31, 2015
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I started exploring in April last year, so quite new still. I was very lucky to start with an online Dom I met on here. It gave me a safe space to explore and can still be very intense. It helped me decide if this is something I want to pursue more.

But don't jump in as I'm sure you're being inundated with offers now. Take the time to get to know him and that beyond the submission you want to be friends. My second online Dom was wonderful as it was a lovely mix of mind and play. I wanted to find all sorts of ways to please him. And it made me realise I did want to try real time.

Take you time - talk to him - ignore the submit now ones. It does feel all consuming and you can get yourself in dangerous situations.

And then enjoy:)
 

Purple_S

<:: Verified ::>
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Apr 21, 2016
52
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8
Kink>Vanilla for some

Honestly I could never go back to vanilla myself even though I have tried in the past. My advice would be, make some friends on here male or female and ask questions. Don't rush into things as yes, it can be dangerous. Feel free to kik me and ask questions, or pm on here, doesn't matter.
 

NotYourGirlfriend

Kink Talk Member
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Jul 24, 2016
30
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Being a slave is very different from being a sub. Make sure you do your research and take the time to REALLY decide if that's what you want.
 

Theheartofdragons

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Dec 14, 2016
37
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I've been looking for abit myself be very careful who u pick to be ur master I'm a switch myself and have been looking for a sub/slave or a mistress for a bit now just an opnion but I suggest that u try being both a dom and a submissive and see which u like it's also good to look at it from both perspectives I've found PM me on her or kik at theheartofdragonwing of u have anymore questions I'm always happy to help someone new
 

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