Ever-growing toolbox for online play, or incorporating classical BDSM concepts into long distance.

pmme_yourfork

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First of, what is this post, well kind of a universal collection of lil trics and ideas for online play, please feel free to comment, sugest and improve.

Toys are often quite limited, there have been numerous threads about different objects, so for that just view this here:
I'm only adding that due to shape and long handle screwdriver handles are quite good buttplug replacements that come in various sizes and are basicly impossible to get lost down there.

Trying to fit more classic BDSM concepts into online play gets interesting here are some ideas:

Spanking:
Using a object instead of the subs hand since its mentaly easyer to hit oneself with it I assume, a wooden spatula serves quite well, for more ideas see the thread linked above, to make it more interactive and less boring, dom can count down from a predefined number and sub just performs the spanking, this gives dom the chance to set the tempo, throw in some creative degredation betwene spanks aswell as count a it wrong/go into the negative numbers obviusly within limits.
This works over text, but voice/video works better because it gives more feedback to decide how much shold be applied.

Sensory deprivement
We can't really put a sub in a vac bed online, but we can partialy restrict them with rope in some more more less stimmulatin positions (using sextoys or not) and then with the help of a gag, a blindfold and earplugs/headphones with noicecanceling/music chosen by dom, we can get quite close to task them with sensory deprivement for 30minutes.
Instead of music and rope, the dom can give instructions over voice during a life session.

Breathplay
Dis one's difficult, dont even try to attempt over text, so voice/video is required.
So, how do we adapt breathplay online and still keep it 100% save?
Well, tell the lil subi simply to hold there breath, you can make it more realistic by having them hold there hand around there neck.
Just telling them to hold it, don't breathe.
But for how long, well under normal circumstances I cam go for about 30 seconds, an out of breath edging sub cam probably go for a quarter of that.
Start with short durations, 5 seconds, building up to perhaps 8 or 10, listen for subs breathing, be sensible here.
And dont tell them to hold there breath for 10seconds, count in your head while encouraging to keep it up, make them wonder how much longer they will hold of before release.

Orgasm Controll
Just saying "you don't get to cum" and imposing mandatory edges migth work for some, but thats not material for a session.
During a session, try fun stuff like counting sub down to orgasm, painfully slow or quick, 10, 9,8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 cum or suprisingly telling them to turn the vibrator off after 5, 4, 3 and enjoy the frustration that ensures, you can even combine this with previously mentioned sensory deprivement or online breathplay, let them guess whn the next orgasn will happen, stay unpredictable and keep them a moaning edged mess.

Temperature play with wax/ice can be done, but I did not find a fitting way to do this online.

Perhaps some other doms are willing to share online specific little tools and tricks.

Cheers.
 

subdream

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This is a very nice collection, thank you.

This works over text, but voice/video works better because it gives more feedback to decide how much shold be applied.
Also do not hesitate to ask the sub for their pain rating. In a good relationship, the sub will be honest.

Well, tell the lil subi simply to hold there breath, you can make it more realistic by having them hold there hand around there neck.
The most important thing here is, that the sub may not press with their hand around the neck.

Just saying "you don't get to cum" and imposing mandatory edges migth work for some, but thats not material for a session.
You can always use a chastity device with a numeric padlock. That said one must have established trust for this to work since ghosting will result in big problems. Another option is one time padlocks, which break when opened (so opening is still possible but clearly visible).
 

pmme_yourfork

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Chastity, orgasm denial and edging.
Aka accountability/ is my sub hiding things from me.

This is a: personal experience and opinions and b: about online play.

So, denial over long distance and online play.
We as a dom should make sure that the sub is happy with whatever is happening, the power dynamic aswell as trust should be at a point where a single sentence is enough to keep sub away from there privates, but the dom should keep it entertaining and fun.
A sub that is lying to there Dom is jeopardising there own fun, that's something that should establish from the get go.
If a sub were to lie, I would not feel personally attacked, but rather want to rediscuss play terms to see if something is not working out.

I'll still give you a practical tip tho: the coin flip.
present two options, one in favore of the sub, one not in there favor. Example: does the sub get to cum, yes/ no.
Integrate it seamlessly into play from time to time and let the sub flip the coin.

Does it always land in favour of the sub, perhaps you need to talk about play terms in a non judgemental way.

Always land against the sub, oh well, I can't give you a one fits all reason for this.

Keep in mind that chance is akward and unpredictable.

Cheers and happy kicking, I would be happy if someone else shares some of there lil tricks tips and opinions.
 

pmme_yourfork

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CnC/ free use

Another quite difficult area of kink to translate into online.
People have personal life's and asking "what are you doing" before every instruction breaks immersion, and no dom can remember the whole schedule of a sub.
We can aid this with a online calender (example:Teamup), accessible by both D and s in which S can setup work, sleep, personal life and "available" times.
D can preplan and input tasks into the calendar or just use it to check whenever S should be free to serve.

This also serves as a neat lil diary, and S can write lil recaps of sessions in there aswell.

Dom can mark certain times for play, naming them accordingly eg :derpthroat training/anal etc or keep it a mystery.

When using Teamup as a calender, set it up on desktop, afterwards the app works great tho!
 

Purple_S

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A screwdriver doesn't sound all that safe. Honestly would have better luck buying a cheap toy than a screwdriver that could be considered "safe". Thinking about all my screwdrivers in my house, seems super dangerous. Some are cheaper materials that have polish on outside. I know a lot of screwdrivers of mine that are cheaper have indents in the metal from use. Screams disaster to me.
 

pmme_yourfork

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A screwdriver doesn't sound all that safe. Honestly would have better luck buying a cheap toy than a screwdriver that could be considered "safe". Thinking about all my screwdrivers in my house, seems super dangerous. Some are cheaper materials that have polish on outside. I know a lot of screwdrivers of mine that are cheaper have indents in the metal from use. Screams disaster to me.
Hey there, well i would like to disagree with you on this one.

Alt of people migth not be able to buy toys out of shame, money or the fact that they still live at home with nosy parrents, in that case i do not se a reason why a simple screwdriver would be unsave compared to a cheaply made toy. (atleast its better suited than many hairbrush handles which are often used in similar fashion)

I am talking about this kind of. Yes the hole is a bitch to clean, but it is without sharp edges and there is no chance of loosing it inside yourself.

Cheers and a good day to you ^^
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Purple_S

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Honestly good point. I moved out young. Still would've preferred dog toys. I REALLY get your point tho. Would it not be weird to find random tools tho. If I were a parent I'd look for worse if the kid proved acting out and untrustworthy. (Yes, never becoming a parent but helped with a member constantly hiding stuff)

Edit: perhaps tape to make sure metal doesn't have an Accident hard to explain in hospitals

2nd edit: with real toys I've almost lost toys
 
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