Lets talk about pain.

Doctor Pervert

Retired
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Private
May 19, 2013
3,508
4,753
483
Pain, it's an interesting and complicated topic central to a lot of bdsm. But what are the various types of pain and how do you judge what level of pain you can tolerate?

First lets do the basics, pain is a sensation that is decoded by your brain in response to electrical impulses from nerves. This is an important thing to note, the sensation you feel when you burn your finger is being made by your brain, break that connection and you don't feel any pain. This is what pain relief drugs do, they interrupt the transmission of these signals to your brain. Mild analgesics like aspirin for instance will work for mild pain, strong analgesics such as lignocaine (actually an anaesthetic) block strong pain.
So even though you feel the pain at the site of the injury, it needs the brain to complete the circuit and make you "feel" it.

The brain also has a huge influence on how pain is perceived, and this is where things get really interesting for us in bdsm. There are sensation that can be described as good pain, and also bad pain. What's the difference, isn't all pain bad? Well, no.
For us in the bdsm world bashing your toe or getting a toothache is bad pain, unwanted and unpleasant in all respects. But things get a lot more complicated when it comes to other types of pain, such as spanking. There are a whole host of differences within the spanking/paddling/whipping realm. Collectively these are referred to as forms of impact play and there are a host of sensations to choose from but the most common two types are stingy vs thuddy. Whips, canes and so on generally produce a sting, while broad paddles are more of a thud on impact. Hand spanking can vary from one to the other depending on technique and there are degrees within all of these that make it one of the most popular pain inducing methods in bdsm.

There are of course lots of other ways to inflict pain including various types of chemical play, things like toothpaste at the mild end up to chili sauces and so on at the more extreme end. Then there are clamps and clips, these cause a crushing of body tissues and again range from mild to extreme in their extent.

So how do you work out what kind of pain you like, what you can stand and where to call it quits? First up always test things somewhere tougher first, like your hand or arm. And yes this goes for the doms/sadists too, you need to understand what you're doing and not just flippantly ask someone else to try something you don't understand yourself.
The most commonly used method for clips or clamps is to use them on the webbing between your thumb and first finger, clip it on there and if you find that too much forget about attaching it anything more sensitive! You can also use this to test duration, leave it clipped on for a 5 minutes, 10 minutes and so on so you get a real feel for it, what's it like when you take it off?
For testing impact play try hitting the top of your thigh, it's easy to reach and much less sensitive and easily bruised than the back of your leg. Again try several hits in the same place at different strengths. This will work for almost all types of implements as well as open hand spanking.
Chemical play is more tricky, first you need to rule out allergies by dabbing a small amount on the forearm skin halfway between your wrist and elbow. If this results in a nasty red rash or even a blister stop right there and do not use it anywhere else. The next step though is where is gets tougher, most of these types of irritants require a soft tissue where the nerve endings are close to the surface of the skin to work. So many times it won't do much at all on your fingers or anywhere other than your intended target. In which case start out small, tiny dabs at first to see how you react. The biggest challenge with this kind of play is the effect usually can't be stopped, once the substance has penetrated the skin it is in there and you can't get it out. So you just have to wait out the effect while the active ingredients do their thing and gradually fade.

Now, do you have any questions about pain? What kind of experiences have you had, good, bad and ugly? Any thoughts or tips?

Time to do some Kink Talking about pain.
 

subdream

Distinguished Member
  • Bisexual
  • Genderfluid
  • Submissive
Feb 18, 2022
240
194
43
allmylinks.com
Well... my very first experience with BDSM which I took an "active" part in was actually a spanking session and I was the passive part in it. I was blindfolded and restrained, several different implements were used on me and I was enjoying all of them. It took a bit of aftercare for me to break free of the session afterwards though.

Fast forward a bit and I know more about pain and my own body. I learned that I enjoy pain differently depending on arousal, especially arousal caused by denial. On the other hand, pain makes me very submissive up to a point where I can be kept in denial just with words, at least for a while.

Unfortunately I wasn't able to test my limits on both aspects, pain tolerance due to denial and denial based on pain yet. I would love to test if I could be held in a neverending circle.