wannabe's

[zsadist]

is it just me.. or are there more and more wannabe's around these days??
So called Dom's who know shit all about being a Dom.. but just say they are so they can get nsfw pictures and tell others what to do..without caring for the wellfare of the sub/slave...

but also said Sub's and slaves.. half of them have no idea what it is to be a sub.. or dont even know why they do it..
other half.. they just let themselves be used by anyone..
ugh.. i should just shut up...

to put things short.. where's the power exchange.. are "traditional Dom(me)'s and subs/slaves a thing of the past??

 

[Doctor Pervert]

I don't think this is a new problem but it certainly seems to come in waves where it a lot more noticeable.
What usually seems to happen is that a lot of the "real" kinky folk go quiet and go into the background. Generally they can smell the pretenders and wannabes and just don't join in their inane conversations which tends to have the effect that a lot of what you see is the rubbish. The actual bdsm community goes on in private.
This isn't good in my opinion as it's not educational and doesn't really encourage newbies into the lifestyle.

 

[Sizzler]

I'm still new to the dom thing(online about year soon). I'm generally kind and caring in nature, I convert this mentality to domination too. Sometimes I get this feeling that I'm less "dommy" because of that and the fact that I'm not always super strict or abusive. I have the aproach that on the other side of the screen is human and I treat them as such before ever thinking as a playtoy to me. Do you think, it's weird? Should I work on my aproach to subs?

 

[Doctor Pervert]

I'm still new to the dom thing(online about year soon). I'm generally kind and caring in nature, I convert this mentality to domination too. Sometimes I get this feeling that I'm less "dommy" because of that and the fact that I'm not always super strict or abusive. I have the aproach that on the other side of the screen is human and I treat them as such before ever thinking as a playtoy to me. Do you think, it's weird? Should I work on my aproach to subs?

You are just being honest and true to your own nature, there is no right or wrong way to be a dom and in fact having that understanding that there is a human on "the other side of the screen" is a good thing. Far too many wannabes forget or ignore that treating the sub like its just some kind of video game where you can whatever you want.
And thats the big difference, there is no problem with being new, after all everyone was new to this at some point. The problem is being new and pretending to know what you are doing, thats the wannabe at their most dangerous and damaging.

 

[eoin62]

I'm still new to the dom thing(online about year soon). I'm generally kind and caring in nature, I convert this mentality to domination too. Sometimes I get this feeling that I'm less "dommy" because of that and the fact that I'm not always super strict or abusive. I have the aproach that on the other side of the screen is human and I treat them as such before ever thinking as a playtoy to me. Do you think, it's weird? Should I work on my aproach to subs?

Frankly, you sound like the type of dom I would love to find. And I doubt that I'm special enough to be the only sub that feels that way.

 

[Sizzler]

Thanks for warm words. When somebody starts being a dom they call themselves a dom without any experience. I did that when I started, but I was always eager to learn. No matter how outstanding your imagination can be if you can meet sb that blows your mind. I'm going to my first shibari party next week, hoping for good fun. Thanks a lot for responses. I'm sorry if I thrashed the segment talking sort of away from the topic. Cheers.