Day 8:
I was right about my balls hurting more when they are full. A simple flick or hard poke hurts a lot more than it normally does. When I can cum again I will do a Milovana tease which involves plenty of CBT so I can really feel how just how painful it would be to be dominated as a orgasm controlled slave.
To be honest, I think this whole denial thing is actually getting easier, I no longer have such strong urges to masturbate before bed (the urge is still there, but its nowhere near as strong as it was when I knew I could just do it). It will probably get to a certain point and become really hard to stop myself from masturbating, but for now I seem to be doing pretty well. The flatmate I have a bit of a crush on isn't going to be here for a while so there is no one in the flat I am really attracted to, which is probably helping me not to think about sexual stuff during the day. Maybe if she had been here I would be a wreak by now because of thinking about those things all the time.
My chastity device should be here tomorrow, that should be fun to try out. I will need to get used to wearing it around the flat and then I will start wearing it when I'm going outside, then when I see someone who I like I will be reminded of my submissiveness by feeling my penis press against its prison.
One thing that is strange, that I can only put down to being sexually frustrated, is that for the past two days, I have not worn socks. Now this might seem silly to some people, but I never get barefoot around the house/flat. I think maybe I want to expose my submissive side to people and because I see feet as being quite a sexual thing it's like I'm naked around the house and I get a slight buzz out of it. I'm probably reading way too much into this, but I can't really see another reason for it.
I was right about my balls hurting more when they are full. A simple flick or hard poke hurts a lot more than it normally does. When I can cum again I will do a Milovana tease which involves plenty of CBT so I can really feel how just how painful it would be to be dominated as a orgasm controlled slave.
To be honest, I think this whole denial thing is actually getting easier, I no longer have such strong urges to masturbate before bed (the urge is still there, but its nowhere near as strong as it was when I knew I could just do it). It will probably get to a certain point and become really hard to stop myself from masturbating, but for now I seem to be doing pretty well. The flatmate I have a bit of a crush on isn't going to be here for a while so there is no one in the flat I am really attracted to, which is probably helping me not to think about sexual stuff during the day. Maybe if she had been here I would be a wreak by now because of thinking about those things all the time.
My chastity device should be here tomorrow, that should be fun to try out. I will need to get used to wearing it around the flat and then I will start wearing it when I'm going outside, then when I see someone who I like I will be reminded of my submissiveness by feeling my penis press against its prison.
One thing that is strange, that I can only put down to being sexually frustrated, is that for the past two days, I have not worn socks. Now this might seem silly to some people, but I never get barefoot around the house/flat. I think maybe I want to expose my submissive side to people and because I see feet as being quite a sexual thing it's like I'm naked around the house and I get a slight buzz out of it. I'm probably reading way too much into this, but I can't really see another reason for it.
