Need advice from D/s couple or D/s married couple

[Wayneh]

I am specifically looking for advice from a married D/s couple because my wife is my submissive pet. We have been married for over 14 years and I can honestly say that know her well. We have always had a somewhat open relationship and are not in the early stages of 24/7 D/s training.

Since we have been married for so long, I know all of her strengths and weaknesses. This is a fantastic tool in training because I do not need to learn these things, I know it. I also know the few things that are super super upsetting to her. Today a conversation with a family member caused her to get extremely upset. I know it is a very bad topic so I found myself comforting her as husband. I called her down when she began to take her emotions out on me and she swiftly apologized, but I still found myself wanting to console her and take away her hurt, even though she just got loud with me.

Is this common with married D/s relationships? Is it acceptable to overlook minor amounts of insubordination when you know she is legitimately upset? Is there a way to punish the outburst while still being comforting? These are just a few questions today. I would love to meet a couple or some couples so I have people to ask specific questions that I can't always find in books.

Thank you in advance,

Wayneh

 

[Doctor Pervert]

I do not have direct experience of living 24/7 D/S and in fact in my over 25 years in the lifestyle have only ever known one couple who lived this way.
It is a lifestyle much talked about but often the proponents neglect to mention exactly these types of problems. My view is that while the basis of the relationship is D/S there are many elements that simply do not work in the real world. These family type interactions are one of the main sources of trouble as just about everyone has family to deal with. So in my view there are times when you have to have a kind of "time out" allowance to deal with these things. Another example is when your sub gets sick, obviously you can't just carry on as normal you need to take up the slack and do stuff you wouldn't normally do.

I suppose its the same as for just about everything, don't get too obsessed with it, don't set rules you can't enforce and above all enjoy yourselves. If its not fun at least most of the time then why do it?

 

[Pet Girlfriend]

She could still need the comfort and support she has relied on for so long. But if she is expressing emotions like that out of habit, it's not wrong to encourage a different way instead. If she is very upset in the moment, it's nice to be considerate. When she's calmed down there's still time to correct her. That way she understands that bad behaviour will be punished without exception, without having to fear not getting your affection when she feels vulnerable. But I'm not married, so I don't know if this is any help.
But good luck!

 

[Sugar_Spice]

I see no reason to punish the outburst. As the good doctor said, this would be an appropriate situation for a time out.