'Sorry Love!this is a 'X' Certificate Film!'-24 year old Married Lisa Fountain was with her Husband Nigel at their local cinema-hoping on watching 'Saturday night fever'-but they would not let her in!'i am 18!i swear!'-Lisa didn't help matters by petulantly stamping her foot 'tell your little sister to go home sir!' the cinema commisionaire says to Nigel-he smiles sympathetically at his youthful looking wife-who could easily pass for a 15 or 16 year old-despite recently celebrating her 24th birthday!Lisa had lived with this for a long time!she was thoroughly pissed off!she even tried dressing 'older'-in unflattering tweed skirts and cardigans-but it just made her look ridiculous!she trudged her way back to her London flat-her hubbie had offered to tell her the plot of the film when he got back-she rings her mum and dad-they laugh at her story!'Lissy!what i wouldn't give to be mistaken for someone younger!her mum says'she slams the phone down in disgust-she has a nice long bath then goes to bed...it is now the height of Summer,Lisa is on holiday on Brighton,dressed in denim cut-offs,trainers and tight red and white striped vest,she walks along the beach alone-her husband is in the pub-but of course they won't serve her!a group of boys-aged about 16-17,in swimming trunks,are chucking a frisbee to each other-it crashes into her back!'OUCH!WATCH WHAT YOUR DOING YOU FUCKING IDIOTS!'she says testily-the boys watching all go 'OOOHHH!'-but one boy comes sympathetically up to her 'are you alright miss?'-Lisa smiles at him 'Yes!thank you!' she turns away 'i don't wish to intrude,but do you have a boyfriend?i think your really pretty!'Lisa blushed-she was so glad her old man wasn't around!'if not-i would like to ask you out!'-Lisa smiled sadly 'sorry!i have a boyfriend!i have had the same one for the past 5 years!'she says truthfully 'wow!was he in your junior class?'-the boy says-he believes Lisa is aged about 15 'yeah!childhood sweetheart!' she gives him a saucy little wink and sashays off-being mistaken for a 15 year old sometimes had it compensations!Lisa then came up with a plan-when she got back home,she would genuinely pretend to be a real 15-year old girl for an entire week-just before the holidays were finally over and she had to get back to her regular job as a dentists assistant,and so she secretly bought a 'Schoolgirl' Uniform-Pleated grey skirt,green and gold striped tie,white socks and emerald green blazer-when her husband Nigel saw her he got such a surprise!very soon they were both making love passionately on the living room floor-Lisa And Nigel had not made love for 3 months!after that,they did it almost everyday!Lisa then decided to have more fun-she goes out alone dressed in the sexy little outfit!as she rounds the corner of a street she can't believe what is in front of her!a group of girls dressed identical to her!they see her 'New girl!what's ya name!'-a big blonde girl shouts out-on her emerald green blazer was a St.Efrdyl's School Badge-Argent,3 Crosslets,Vert-the famous Catholic All-Girl's Boarding School in Caerwent,Wales-famous for its Iron 'discipline'-Lisa says nothing-Dumbfounded 'OI!I'M SPEAKING TO YOU!CLOTH EARS!'-the girl runs up and grabs one of Lisa's 'Pigtails'-Lisa fights back!punching the girl in the stomach-the other girls form a circle 'FIGHT!FIGHT!FIGHT!'-Lisa gives the girl a terrific right hook-giving the girl a split lip!it was at that point that a man-wearing what appears to be a long black dress-grabs Lisa roughly by her left ear-he mutters something in a foreign lanquage(it turns out to be Welsh)Lisa-now thoroughly enraged-kicked his shins!this produces much hilarity from the girls watching!'that new girl!she has some spirit!' one says 'she won't be sitting down comfortably for the next week!' another girls guffaws,Lisa and the man-Father O'Byrne,go with the girls to a bus parked nearby-other girls are on it-acting 'rowdily'-but fall silent when they see Father O'Byrne-the girl who Lisa punched tells him Lisa threw the first punch-Lisa protests she was severely provoked-but the priest will have nothing more be said-he can see how badly cut his pupils lip is!he tells the driver to take the bus off to the local hospital-it is not serious and she soon comes back on board the bus-the Priest then decides to make a public example of Lisa-sitting down on one of the bus seats,he hauled the still protesting Lisa over his lap and after pulling her knickers down-which he was disgusted to see were not of the 'school regulation'type in emerald green-he then thoroughly tanned Lisa's Hide!the girls in the bus watching on and laughing as Lissy kicked her legs,as she felt her bottom getting warmer and warmer'and ya ken expect 30 strokes of the cane from the headmaster when we get back to Caerwent!'he says after finishing-Lisa then ran out of the bus as fast as she could!pursued by the priest-he corners her in a small park-he sends her flying to the ground with a rugby tackle!'i've not finished with ya yet young lady!'he hisses in her ear-pinning her arms back,he drags her close to a tree-he breaks off a nice 'whippy' small branch 'just a little taster of what ye can expect back home!'and with one hand he whipped Lisa's Knickers down again and gave her a very painful 'switching' with the tree branch 30 times-during this,Lisa called the priest every name under the sun!afterwards-'ah,i see!i don't think we can wait till then!your arse needs a real proper thrashing properly right now!'the priest then dragged Lisa into town-there was a shop 'Cane manafacturers'-he goes into it-he asks for their thickest cane-he gets out his wallet and pays-still holding onto Lisa with his other hand-he thanks the man who hands the cane over to him-he then drags off Lisa to a piece of remote wasteground-no one else is in sight 'Touch your toes Girl!'-the priest slashes the cane through the air-Lisa,now believing she is in a nightmare and will wake up any second now says 'NO!FUCK OFF!'-the priest brings the cane slashing down across Lisa's naked thigh's! 'TOUCH YA TOES!'-Lisa-now completely terrified out of her wits, obeyed this time-the priest then whipped up her skirt and pulled down her knickers-THWACK!THWACK!THWACK!THWACK!THWACK!THWACK!-the priest thrashed Lisa's naked backside mercilessly!'Lisa started to howl!'stop blubbing girl!pain is a gift from god girl!embrace it!'he says unsympathetically!but in spite of this-she was,reluctantly,starting to enjoy it!'now-go and confess ya sins to god and meet me back on the bus in 10 minites sharp!then it's another 6 back at the hotel before ya go to bed!'-he then directs her to the gates of the local Catholic church-then walks off-expecting her, like the good Obediant Little Catholic girl he believes her to be,to go inside-but Lisa now ran back home...Lissy did eventually make her confession though-but not to a Catholic Priest!it was to her husband Nigel-he roared with laughter!the next day Nigel made a visit to the cane manafacturer's shop-he bought several of them in different sizes-it was a good job his wife was a dental assistant!as it didn't entail sitting down much!EPILOGUE:'right Father!lets get that tooth out!'-a few days later,Lisa was back at work-she is filling up the hypodermic syringe with anaesthetic-on the dentist's chair is none other than Father O'Byrne!his mouth wired open-he has had bad 'toothache'for days, and needs a lower molar extracted-Lisa cheekily dilutes it down with water from the tap-in front of the horrified priest's eyes 'Pain is a gift from God Father!embrace it!' she whispers in his ear as she bends over him with the hypodermic...SECRETSPANKER
