Why am I submissive to this weirdo woman? Is this my kink?

[Silvana 1975]

I'm sure by now you are curious just how far she could push you and this is obviously weighing on your mind. Since you have already concluded this is something you actually enjoy and get very excited by you perhaps could take it further.
Do you know where you could find her again in a public situation? If so you could test yourself in various ways by making sure your clothing is more revealing than normal and perhaps even go without a bra. If this encourages her to even more invasive groping then you can just see where it goes.

You are totally right. I am allowing it to happen, so this ginger midget groper woman probably thinks i enjoy it on some level and that it might go even further at some point. This weird woman groper will chance a further step each time she sees me. I am totally immobile as my humiliation happens. I show shock and horror but i show no resistance. Maybe this midget groper woman at this point believes anything is acceptable to me. I admit to you that I enjoy the public humiliation, publicly being groped by this creepy weird midget woman. I enjoy the embarrassment. It is not something that I'm proud of but I'm not ashamed of it either. I get a great thrill out of this lesbian groper thinking that I am uncomfortable, grossed and shocked by her actions. If she finds out that I like it , it will ruin it for me. I like the idea that she thinks she's getting a way with publicly rubbing me and groping me without my consent. About two weeks ago she sent me a friend request on FB, and i declined her. If I did accept her, I think it would ruin everything for me. I don't want to become friends with her.

 

[Doctor Pervert]

You are totally right. I am allowing it to happen, so this ginger midget groper woman probably thinks i enjoy it on some level and that it might go even further at some point. This weird woman groper will chance a further step each time she sees me. I am totally immobile as my humiliation happens. I show shock and horror but i show no resistance. Maybe this midget groper woman at this point believes anything is acceptable to me. I admit to you that I enjoy the public humiliation, publicly being groped by this creepy weird midget woman. I enjoy the embarrassment. It is not something that I'm proud of but I'm not ashamed of it either. I get a great thrill out of this lesbian groper thinking that I am uncomfortable, grossed and shocked by her actions. If she finds out that I like it , it will ruin it for me. I like the idea that she thinks she's getting a way with publicly rubbing me and groping me without my consent. About two weeks ago she sent me a friend request on FB, and i declined her. If I did accept her, I think it would ruin everything for me. I don't want to become friends with her.

That doesn't answer my question, do you know how to set up another encounter with her in a public situation?

 

[MissKubo]

It's not often that I disagree with droptokon but something about this woman seems very off to me. I don't want to come across as a buzz kill but she seems to have an almost hypnotic hold over you as well as her overly defensive cousin and probably all of the other women who have seen the way she's been treating you and not gotten involved (probably relieved that she's latched onto you and not them).

This could be a carefully crafted persona that she's been using to get what she wants, in your case a job. When you give her a job, she'll want a raise, a promotion, more time off than she's entitled to, or to be able to get away with sub-standard service.

Sure, she may not be able to threaten you physically, it's more of a mental hold she has on you, but you're a business owner. She could blackmail you or else just ruin your reputation out of spite. I've seen first hand how a friend's harmless little kink could lose them their professional standing and I would certainly be very wary about any further contact with this woman.

If you want to understand your kink, try it with your husband. When you're in a relatively quiet coffee shop or book store you could discretely hand him your panties and tell him you need to feel his hands on your body and you can't wait.

When you're in bed with him, you could get yourself aroused thinking about being with a younger guy. Maybe he'd want to watch. When he asks you what's gotten you so hot you can tell him the fantasy, tell him you read it in a women's magazine or something?

It's a lot safer than putting yourself back in this weirdo woman's hands (quite literally)

 

[Silvana 1975]

It's not often that I disagree with droptokon but something about this woman seems very off to me. I don't want to come across as a buzz kill but she seems to have an almost hypnotic hold over you as well as her overly defensive cousin and probably all of the other women who have seen the way she's been treating you and not gotten involved (probably relieved that she's latched onto you and not them).

This could be a carefully crafted persona that she's been using to get what she wants, in your case a job. When you give her a job, she'll want a raise, a promotion, more time off than she's entitled to, or to be able to get away with sub-standard service.

Sure, she may not be able to threaten you physically, it's more of a mental hold she has on you, but you're a business owner. She could blackmail you or else just ruin your reputation out of spite. I've seen first hand how a friend's harmless little kink could lose them their professional standing and I would certainly be very wary about any further contact with this woman.

If you want to understand your kink, try it with your husband. When you're in a relatively quiet coffee shop or book store you could discretely hand him your panties and tell him you need to feel his hands on your body and you can't wait.

When you're in bed with him, you could get yourself aroused thinking about being with a younger guy. Maybe he'd want to watch. When he asks you what's gotten you so hot you can tell him the fantasy, tell him you read it in a women's magazine or something?

It's a lot safer than putting yourself back in this weirdo woman's hands (quite literally)

Thank you for your response. You are right. She does have an almost hypnotic hold over me. Maybe you are right. Maybe she has decided that she is going to make my life miserable and use me, and she may quite possibly try to somehow rape me too. Do you think that this touchy feely small ginger woman is some kind of sociopath. What do you think? As long as she is not really harming me in any way i should let her to publicly touch me and grope me for my meta pleasure? I somehow think it is because of her size, that she is so small that i let her do these things. A man being bigger and stronger i would resist fiercely. I am so confused. Her cousin says that this weird small woman is just showing appreciation for my curves, height and clothes. She says that her cousin just admires me. She says that asexual people are touchy feely. She says that asexual people are cuddle maniacs. She says that wanting to touch and grope other people is something common among asexual people. I am big woman. I am 5 ft 11 and being well endowed well built and curvy always on high heels makes me HUGE! About a year ago I was at Costco with my daughter and this little boy pointed at me and said something like: "Gush mom, look at her, she is giant!!!" But I love my height and my curvy stature. This woman groper is total opposite of me. Maybe that is why i enjoy being dominated by her. But why? I am a straight woman. I have never been attracted to a woman sexually. I am STRICTLY hetero. I've never had any desire to do anything sexual with a female. Also this woman groper is ugly, creepy and repulsive to me.



I can't discuss about this situation verbally with anyone. I just can't. I just want to discuss about my situation. Coming on here was a first huge step. I love my husband.I try my hardest.I am so lonely having no one to talk to about this situation with this weird ginger groper small woman. I barely have any friends. I just want someone to understand, hear me. When I do speak with people, I tend to be overly nice to compensate and I guess that comes off as fake which definitely doesn't help the situation. People around me (except for the ones who truly know me) have always said that I come across as snobby, stuck on myself, and unfriendly. The truth is, I'm just really shy and insecure when it comes to socializing with people. I do have several close friends, but it bugs me that A LOT of people think I'm a snob when that couldn't be further from the truth. I have been told that I seem snobby and it is because I don't speak up in groups where I am not comfortable. I have had people ask me if I thought I was better than others.

To my surprise, I have found I like to be dominated by this creepy repulsive weirdo woman. But i get no direct sexual pleasure out of this short skinny creepy woman's groping. I get meta pleasure. I have eroticised the passive suffering of the repulsive treatment i get. The core of this passiveness is how i am frozen to the spot and cannot move or say anything. It is an incredible feeling, and it is this what i have eroticised. But WHY? As far as having intimacy with a woman? That's just something that I haven't done and will probably not do so. Im a straight woman never got turned on by a women. But how can I be a 100% straight and still enjoy this?

There is a state I get into that I am struggling to understand.There are some things I don't know how to describe to you. What is wrong with me? I am so confused about what is happening to me!Whether or not it is my fault or not!I feel so ashamed.When she places her hands on me i can't move my hands and legs and i can't speak.She has power over me. Why? I'm just lost. Should I even be upset?I'm SO embarrassed. I am being treated as a sex object by this creepy ugly woman groper. But I don't even feel angry at this groper woman for what she is doing to me, which I don't understand. Maybe it was just sheer embarrassment to start with. But now i have eroticised that passive reaction. I admit to you that i look forward to it. I like to talk about it. That is where i am now.

 

[gbdare]

Sexuality is a lot more complicated than we've generally been taught to think. There's a lot more to it than straight, gay, or bi. To me, those descriptions are very limited as they only deal with what gender we are sexually attracted to. Other factors may be as, or even more, important than that to sexual arousal. In my case, I'm an exhibitionist and that aspect of my sexuality is actually stronger than being straight. I'm only attracted to women, but I am sexually aroused by being seen naked by any adult who enjoys seeing me naked, regardless of what that person's gender is. When I was younger, I was (as many straight men are) very homophobic, but as I became more secure with my own sexuality, I realized that "showing off" for men was quite arousing for me. I don't care about seeing other men naked, but I LOVE being seen by them, just as much as I do by women.

It sounds like you may be turned on by submission and/or humiliation much the way I am by exhibitionism. I don't think you are attracted to this woman, but you are attracted to the way she makes you feel. There's nothing wrong with that and such kinks are relatively common. Psychologists generally consider sexual kinks to be normal as long as in practicing them nobody suffers any lasting physical or emotional harm. That said, as someone else mentioned, the behavior of that woman is more than a little "off". Consensual domination and humiliation of someone is fine, non-consensual is not. Even though you did not resist and perhaps even enjoyed it is irrelevant. Someone who approaches a complete stranger and immediately begins groping them without permission is not behaving normally - such behavior would even be frowned upon in the setting of a kink or swingers club, let alone a non-sexual setting. I encourage you to further explore your potential submission/humiliation kink if you choose to do so, but I would strongly recommend you avoid further interactions with that woman as much as possible.

 

[Silvana 1975]

Sexuality is a lot more complicated than we've generally been taught to think. There's a lot more to it than straight, gay, or bi. To me, those descriptions are very limited as they only deal with what gender we are sexually attracted to. Other factors may be as, or even more, important than that to sexual arousal. In my case, I'm an exhibitionist and that aspect of my sexuality is actually stronger than being straight. I'm only attracted to women, but I am sexually aroused by being seen naked by any adult who enjoys seeing me naked, regardless of what that person's gender is. When I was younger, I was (as many straight men are) very homophobic, but as I became more secure with my own sexuality, I realized that "showing off" for men was quite arousing for me. I don't care about seeing other men naked, but I LOVE being seen by them, just as much as I do by women.

It sounds like you may be turned on by submission and/or humiliation much the way I am by exhibitionism. I don't think you are attracted to this woman, but you are attracted to the way she makes you feel. There's nothing wrong with that and such kinks are relatively common. Psychologists generally consider sexual kinks to be normal as long as in practicing them nobody suffers any lasting physical or emotional harm. That said, as someone else mentioned, the behavior of that woman is more than a little "off". Consensual domination and humiliation of someone is fine, non-consensual is not. Even though you did not resist and perhaps even enjoyed it is irrelevant. Someone who approaches a complete stranger and immediately begins groping them without permission is not behaving normally - such behavior would even be frowned upon in the setting of a kink or swingers club, let alone a non-sexual setting. I encourage you to further explore your potential submission/humiliation kink if you choose to do so, but I would strongly recommend you avoid further interactions with that woman as much as possible.

You seem to really get to a bottom of things. I am kinda attracted to the way this woman groper makes me feel.
Do you think I am actually submissive?
I don’t really know who to talk to about any of it. Is there a reason why I react like this specifically with this much smaller older masculine creepy ginger woman? I am a heterosexual woman. I have never been attracted to a woman sexually. So you think that i subconsciously enjoyed being publicly groped by this creepy small older woman. Whenever I am in front of this weird skinny masculine ginger woman who is a lot shorter and older than myself - I guess I become very submissive because I subconsciously want to avoid angering her or something. Why?



I can confirm that this small ginger woman gives no fucks. On those two occasions she was constantly feeling me up. She humiliated me in front of everyone on those two occasions. She practically constantly had her hands all over me . I think most women gropers don't see what they're doing in those situations as harassment or sexual assault. This might be part of it, but I think another aspect (at least in terms of taking sexual harassment seriously) is based on the archaic ideas that women are not capable of violence, don't seek out sex, and so on. I feel this is why women are not treated as offenders as readily as men. When we women complain about other women sexually harassing us, it is seen as laughable, so we learn to just ignore it or brush it off if we don’t like it.
.

The catch here and what makes women on women groping different than its harmless: I never once fear for my safety. I imagine other women feel the same and that’s why it’s not viewed as much of a problem compared to women being assaulted/groped by men.

 

[gbdare]

You seem to really get to a bottom of things. I am kinda attracted to the way this woman groper makes me feel.
Do you think I am actually submissive?
I don’t really know who to talk to about any of it. Is there a reason why I react like this specifically with this much smaller older masculine creepy ginger woman? I am a heterosexual woman. I have never been attracted to a woman sexually. So you think that i subconsciously enjoyed being publicly groped by this creepy small older woman. Whenever I am in front of this weird skinny masculine ginger woman who is a lot shorter and older than myself - I guess I become very submissive because I subconsciously want to avoid angering her or something. Why?



I can confirm that this small ginger woman gives no fucks. On those two occasions she was constantly feeling me up. She humiliated me in front of everyone on those two occasions. She practically constantly had her hands all over me . I think most women gropers don't see what they're doing in those situations as harassment or sexual assault. This might be part of it, but I think another aspect (at least in terms of taking sexual harassment seriously) is based on the archaic ideas that women are not capable of violence, don't seek out sex, and so on. I feel this is why women are not treated as offenders as readily as men. When we women complain about other women sexually harassing us, it is seen as laughable, so we learn to just ignore it or brush it off if we don’t like it.
.

The catch here and what makes women on women groping different than its harmless: I never once fear for my safety. I imagine other women feel the same and that’s why it’s not viewed as much of a problem compared to women being assaulted/groped by men.

My best guess is that you are turned on by the humiliation and possibly the submissiveness as well. I think it may not really have anything to do with that particular woman, other than the fact that she doesn't respect other people's boundaries, and because of her out of the ordinary behavior she may simply have been the first person to put you in the position of being publicly humiliated/submissive. In other words, I think you may have always had that neurological "button" of being aroused by humiliation and/or submission, and she was just the first person to push that button. Under those circumstances, it would be easy to mistake her as the source of the arousal, when in fact it may simply have been your own latent tendencies being triggered by the situations she put you in. As you said, because she's a woman, there's not an automatic fear of being sexually assaulted like there might be with a man (at least one you didn't know and trust), and without that, you may have been more susceptible to the sexual arousal from the humiliation/submission.

 

[Silvana 1975]

My best guess is that you are turned on by the humiliation and possibly the submissiveness as well. I think it may not really have anything to do with that particular woman, other than the fact that she doesn't respect other people's boundaries, and because of her out of the ordinary behavior she may simply have been the first person to put you in the position of being publicly humiliated/submissive. In other words, I think you may have always had that neurological "button" of being aroused by humiliation and/or submission, and she was just the first person to push that button. Under those circumstances, it would be easy to mistake her as the source of the arousal, when in fact it may simply have been your own latent tendencies being triggered by the situations she put you in. As you said, because she's a woman, there's not an automatic fear of being sexually assaulted like there might be with a man (at least one you didn't know and trust), and without that, you may have been more susceptible to the sexual arousal from the humiliation/submission.

Actually this was my first time getting groped. I've always had big boobs. I easily had the largest chest in my high school. But I was one of the lucky ones that's never had her boobs grabbed, touched, or jiggled before. Maybe subconsciously i feel safe with this small skinny ginger woman groper, because the chances that she could actually rape me are virtually nil. She is dominant and invasive, but she is just to small to physically rape me forcefully. Honestly i would I scream my head off if a man did it but I can’t verbalize a succinct “NO” to this short skinny creepy ginger woman. On both occasions I didn’t say anything or tell her to stop. I have never had a man even ask to touch me, let alone do it without permission. I haven't been touched by strange men in a creepy way. I have large boobs and big butt, and some men like to tell me about them. Men talk about them a lot, but no man ever dares to touch them. If he did I would tell him to fuck off. If he did I would scream. If he did I might even report it. I've been told to my face that “at first I thought you were a bitch but you're actually really nice.” More than once. I'm a naturally quiet person, the speak-when-spoken-to type, and I know that it may come off as rude. I’m deemed less approachable, which is a blessing and a curse. Sometimes I do look extra mean on purpose depending on the circumstances (like walking past a large group of people, I get intimidated). I'm actually really nice, accepting, helpful and kind.


There are dresses that I can never wear because, while on someone with smaller breasts it would look ok, on me it looks vulgar. This issue of vulgarity isn’t something that I would have necessarily impressed upon myself, but rather the reaction that I get from people. I would love to wear strappy dresses with little triangle cups! I would love to wear certain shirts and blouses without something underneath for the sake of modesty (well, someone else’s idea of modesty not necessarily my own). I wear almost always my satin and silk blouses fully buttoned to the top combined with a satin skirt or satin pants. I don't wear anything vulgar but because of my body type anything i wear looks tight on me. The truth is I regulate a lot of what I wear so that people won’t take it as an invitation to touch, stare, or speak to or about my breasts or ass. I have had the experience of women being jealous of me. I like satin and silk clothes and I wear them well. I should not have to suffer for what I like because other women have low self esteem and don’t see the gifts they have within themselves. I have a more stylish sense of fashion. I never wear anything trashy, I keep myself well covered and strive for professionalism and class.

 

[Deleted member 51079]

hey! this is so weird i have a similar problem but kinda different too. i'm 22, short a bit curvy with (i think) nice boobs and work as a receptionist at a real estate office. my boss is a tall woman with big boobs and is very touchy feely with me all the time, she comes up behind me and grabs my ass in the lunch room then makes a joke about it. when i'm at the fornt desk she often stands over me and leans forward so her boobs rest on my head while she points to things on my computer. at the office xmas party she kept dancing with me and several times pulled my face into her boobs.
the thing is i don't reallt mind and i kinda like it. i'm bi anyway and have had sex with girls plenty often but not been with anyone so much bigger than me. i'm also very sub and like being bossed around and so theres that too.
being as she my boss and all i know she shouldnt do it and its workplace harrasment and all but its also fun to be just an object that she plays with and thing is i dont want to spoil it by letting her know i like it so yeah.
it started about 6 months ago and in all that time i just go along with it, i even started dressing extra sexy whicb the owner likes too cause he's just a dirty old perv anyway so short skrts and low cut tops are fine with him!
i try an do sht like bend over while shes watching to flash my undies at her or when i bring her coffee bend so my top falls open and that kinda stuff. she alwasy pretends not to see but i know she can. shes also old like you 40's and that also seems weird to me but its also part of the fun to be teasing this big old woman and she pays me back by groping me. we only ever talk about business but i know shes married and has kids too like you.
i dunno is this the same kinda kinky thing stuff you think?

 

[gbdare]

Actually this was my first time getting groped. I've always had big boobs. I easily had the largest chest in my high school. But I was one of the lucky ones that's never had her boobs grabbed, touched, or jiggled before. Maybe subconsciously i feel safe with this small skinny ginger woman groper, because the chances that she could actually rape me are virtually nil. She is dominant and invasive, but she is just to small to physically rape me forcefully. Honestly i would I scream my head off if a man did it but I can’t verbalize a succinct “NO” to this short skinny creepy ginger woman. On both occasions I didn’t say anything or tell her to stop. I have never had a man even ask to touch me, let alone do it without permission. I haven't been touched by strange men in a creepy way. I have large boobs and big butt, and some men like to tell me about them. Men talk about them a lot, but no man ever dares to touch them. If he did I would tell him to fuck off. If he did I would scream. If he did I might even report it. I've been told to my face that “at first I thought you were a bitch but you're actually really nice.” More than once. I'm a naturally quiet person, the speak-when-spoken-to type, and I know that it may come off as rude. I’m deemed less approachable, which is a blessing and a curse. Sometimes I do look extra mean on purpose depending on the circumstances (like walking past a large group of people, I get intimidated). I'm actually really nice, accepting, helpful and kind.


There are dresses that I can never wear because, while on someone with smaller breasts it would look ok, on me it looks vulgar. This issue of vulgarity isn’t something that I would have necessarily impressed upon myself, but rather the reaction that I get from people. I would love to wear strappy dresses with little triangle cups! I would love to wear certain shirts and blouses without something underneath for the sake of modesty (well, someone else’s idea of modesty not necessarily my own). I wear almost always my satin and silk blouses fully buttoned to the top combined with a satin skirt or satin pants. I don't wear anything vulgar but because of my body type anything i wear looks tight on me. The truth is I regulate a lot of what I wear so that people won’t take it as an invitation to touch, stare, or speak to or about my breasts or ass. I have had the experience of women being jealous of me. I like satin and silk clothes and I wear them well. I should not have to suffer for what I like because other women have low self esteem and don’t see the gifts they have within themselves. I have a more stylish sense of fashion. I never wear anything trashy, I keep myself well covered and strive for professionalism and class.

From what you said, I think it's pretty safe to say you're not an exhibitionist, which I think was something you asked about before. Exhibitionists love drawing attention to their bodies and that does not sound like you.

You've also at least somewhat confirmed that the arousal you've had from your experiences with this woman may be more due to her "pushing buttons" that just never have been pushed before, rather than due to feeling aroused by her as a person. I also want to reiterate that I think you should keep your distance from her as much as possible. Her behavior is on the sociopathic side of the spectrum and while she's probably not a physical threat to you, she could very well cause you trouble in other ways. In particular, since you are a nice, accepting, helpful and kind person, you might feel compelled to give her a chance to work for you and I think that would be a very big mistake! Sociopaths are not necessarily "bad" or "evil" people, but they are often tough to deal with and they can definitely create problems in a workplace - everything from mild issues like just creating interpersonal conflicts to embezzlement or even intentional sabotage of the business.

As far as whether you're aroused by humiliation, submission, or both, I think it may take a little more exploration of your feelings with what happened with the woman and/or experimenting some with her out of the equation. For example, think about whether it was the fact that everyone was watching her grope you and treat you like a sexual object (humiliation), or the fact that you didn't resist or tell her to stop (submission) that seems like the more arousing aspect of those experiences. If you feel comfortable talking with your husband about it, and he's willing to participate in exploring this kink with you in a more safe and controlled setting, it could be something that really spices up your sex life. If you don't feel like you can involve him, it may be best to try to set it aside, at least for now and just to accept that your behavior and feelings were within the realm of normal, despite the fact that the woman who elicited them was not behaving normally.

 

[gbdare]

hey! this is so weird i have a similar problem but kinda different too. i'm 22, short a bit curvy with (i think) nice boobs and work as a receptionist at a real estate office. my boss is a tall woman with big boobs and is very touchy feely with me all the time, she comes up behind me and grabs my ass in the lunch room then makes a joke about it. when i'm at the fornt desk she often stands over me and leans forward so her boobs rest on my head while she points to things on my computer. at the office xmas party she kept dancing with me and several times pulled my face into her boobs.
the thing is i don't reallt mind and i kinda like it. i'm bi anyway and have had sex with girls plenty often but not been with anyone so much bigger than me. i'm also very sub and like being bossed around and so theres that too.
being as she my boss and all i know she shouldnt do it and its workplace harrasment and all but its also fun to be just an object that she plays with and thing is i dont want to spoil it by letting her know i like it so yeah.
it started about 6 months ago and in all that time i just go along with it, i even started dressing extra sexy whicb the owner likes too cause he's just a dirty old perv anyway so short skrts and low cut tops are fine with him!
i try an do sht like bend over while shes watching to flash my undies at her or when i bring her coffee bend so my top falls open and that kinda stuff. she alwasy pretends not to see but i know she can. shes also old like you 40's and that also seems weird to me but its also part of the fun to be teasing this big old woman and she pays me back by groping me. we only ever talk about business but i know shes married and has kids too like you.
i dunno is this the same kinda kinky thing stuff you think?

I don't know if your were looking for input from only Silvana, but I'll offer my perspective and you can do with it what you will.

I think your situation is somewhat different from hers in that you actually enjoy the attention and are comfortable with bisexuality. Silvana is adamantly straight and seemed to find the attention from the woman who groped her more than a little disturbing, even if she did experience arousal from it. Also, it sounds like you may have some exhibitionistic tendencies (you seem to like showing off your body, where she seems to prefer to stay mostly covered). As far as it being right or wrong or workplace harrassment, if you as the "harrassed" person are not bothered by it, I don't see a problem with it. As long as everybody's happy and everything is all in fun, I say enjoy it! And as a dirty old perv myself, I am envious of the owner of your office who gets to see you dressed extra sexy and your showing off for your boss, lol!

 

[Deleted member 51079]

I don't know if your were looking for input from only Silvana, but I'll offer my perspective and you can do with it what you will.

I think your situation is somewhat different from hers in that you actually enjoy the attention and are comfortable with bisexuality. Silvana is adamantly straight and seemed to find the attention from the woman who groped her more than a little disturbing, even if she did experience arousal from it. Also, it sounds like you may have some exhibitionistic tendencies (you seem to like showing off your body, where she seems to prefer to stay mostly covered). As far as it being right or wrong or workplace harrassment, if you as the "harrassed" person are not bothered by it, I don't see a problem with it. As long as everybody's happy and everything is all in fun, I say enjoy it! And as a dirty old perv myself, I am envious of the owner of your office who gets to see you dressed extra sexy and your showing off for your boss, lol!

thanks, yes you're right i do like to show off a bit i guess its just ive never seen anything much written about girls groping other girls like this thats why i said it was the sort of the same, see what i mean?

 

[Silvana 1975]

hey! this is so weird i have a similar problem but kinda different too. i'm 22, short a bit curvy with (i think) nice boobs and work as a receptionist at a real estate office. my boss is a tall woman with big boobs and is very touchy feely with me all the time, she comes up behind me and grabs my ass in the lunch room then makes a joke about it. when i'm at the fornt desk she often stands over me and leans forward so her boobs rest on my head while she points to things on my computer. at the office xmas party she kept dancing with me and several times pulled my face into her boobs.
the thing is i don't reallt mind and i kinda like it. i'm bi anyway and have had sex with girls plenty often but not been with anyone so much bigger than me. i'm also very sub and like being bossed around and so theres that too.
being as she my boss and all i know she shouldnt do it and its workplace harrasment and all but its also fun to be just an object that she plays with and thing is i dont want to spoil it by letting her know i like it so yeah.
it started about 6 months ago and in all that time i just go along with it, i even started dressing extra sexy whicb the owner likes too cause he's just a dirty old perv anyway so short skrts and low cut tops are fine with him!
i try an do sht like bend over while shes watching to flash my undies at her or when i bring her coffee bend so my top falls open and that kinda stuff. she alwasy pretends not to see but i know she can. shes also old like you 40's and that also seems weird to me but its also part of the fun to be teasing this big old woman and she pays me back by groping me. we only ever talk about business but i know shes married and has kids too like you.
i dunno is this the same kinda kinky thing stuff you think?

Your situation is totally different. You are bisexual. I am a straight woman, I love men, simple! I am straight and I am completely 100 percent straight. I have never been attracted to a woman sexually. I am STRICTLY hetero. Even the thought of eating out a vagina makes me gag. I've never had any desire to do anything sexual with a female. But i subconsciously enjoy being publicly groped by this older small creepy woman. Why? Having my ass rubbed and my breasts rubbed (over clothes) publicly by this woman is something I tolerated. What is wrong with me? I was being treated as a sex object by this small ginger woman groper. But I don't even feel angry at this touchy feely woman for what she did to me, which I don't understand. I just can't speak in person with anyone about these issues. I just can't. My husband doesn't know that i am on this forum.

 

[gbdare]

I'm sorry that you don't have somebody in your life to talk to about this. I really don't think there's anything wrong with you. I can understand why it would be upsetting to you that you allowed that woman to treat you that way and more upsetting still that at some level you may have enjoyed it. Unexpectedly discovering something about yourself like that can make you question your self-identity. There's nothing wrong with having a humiliation and/or submission kink. But if the way you responded conflicts with who you thought you were and how you think you should have reacted, it can be pretty scary. People don't choose their kinks (or non-kink aspects of their sexuality for that matter), they're just an inborn part of how their brains are wired for sexual arousal. People will often search for some cause or initiating event that "made them that way", but in many cases, there's no definitive reason for the kinks someone has. They just are what they are. The good news is that in most cases, and most probably in your case, they don't cause any harm - besides maybe freaking you out a bit initially. The way I suggest you look at it is that you learned something new about yourself and now you can decide what to do with that knowledge. You can explore that aspect more if you choose to do so, or you can set aside as a something that's just a quirk of your sexuality and maybe think about how you will handle it in the future if someone else happens to push that button on you again.

 

[kaylessa]

Sorry to chime in late, but here are my 2 cents.

i know she shouldnt do it and its workplace harrasment and all

It's only harassment if you don't want it. Well okay, it might be harassment from a legal point of view, but who want's to blame her? You probably don't. As long as both of you have fun and nobody else is harmed, bothing to worry about. And based on your avatar I can understand her.

Your situation is totally different. You are bisexual. I am a straight woman, I love men, simple! I am straight and I am completely 100 percent straight. I have never been attracted to a woman sexually. I am STRICTLY hetero.

I don't want to insult you, but you asked us to be brutally honest. Based on my own experiences people who repeat "I'm hetero" over and over are just fooling themselves. But even if it's right and you're actually pure hetero, that doesn't mean anything at all, it's just a label. I for example consider myself lesbian since I'm only attracted to females. That said, I do love to feel a dildo in my mouth. I love to give blowjobs, while I'm not attracted to guys at all. That said, I would be able to submit to a man, I sometimes dream about it. But given that me being a slave means sex slave about 100% of the time, I would probably never submit to a man in real life. It's complicated, but I'm not that much different. The labels "homosexual" and "heterosexual" are just that: labels. In reality, every human being is different and millions of "in betweens" exist. I'd say you enjoy certain things with females and don't enjoy other things with females, no need to choose either homo or hetero.

 

[Silvana 1975]

I'm sorry that you don't have somebody in your life to talk to about this. I really don't think there's anything wrong with you. I can understand why it would be upsetting to you that you allowed that woman to treat you that way and more upsetting still that at some level you may have enjoyed it. Unexpectedly discovering something about yourself like that can make you question your self-identity. There's nothing wrong with having a humiliation and/or submission kink. But if the way you responded conflicts with who you thought you were and how you think you should have reacted, it can be pretty scary. People don't choose their kinks (or non-kink aspects of their sexuality for that matter), they're just an inborn part of how their brains are wired for sexual arousal. People will often search for some cause or initiating event that "made them that way", but in many cases, there's no definitive reason for the kinks someone has. They just are what they are. The good news is that in most cases, and most probably in your case, they don't cause any harm - besides maybe freaking you out a bit initially. The way I suggest you look at it is that you learned something new about yourself and now you can decide what to do with that knowledge. You can explore that aspect more if you choose to do so, or you can set aside as a something that's just a quirk of your sexuality and maybe think about how you will handle it in the future if someone else happens to push that button on you again.

It happened again. Yesterday on my way home i stopped at the drugstore. I was wearing my purple satin belted trench long coat. This touchy feely ginger small woman was there. She was behind me in the line. She said to me "uuuu i love your coat. Big woman you are always so elegant. I like that you are always dressed up in satin and silk, i like touching your clothes. You are always so elegant and classy. " Then she started rubbing my back with her both hands as she was standing behind me in a line. On the parking lot she walked beside me, she was rubbing my lower back and my butt with her right hand. I tried to walk faster but i was on 5inch high heels. Then this weird ginger small woman gave me a side hug and she started rubbing my back and my butt with her left hand and with her right hand rubbing my whole front side for like 5 minutes in the middle of the parking lot while she was commenting on my coat . Her marauding hands were all over me, while she stared greedily with her creepy freckled lust-filled face. I just stood there speechless stiff as a board as people watched waiting for her to finish. Then she walked to her cousin's car.
Instead of outrage, i felt a strange, paralyzing shame, but also again i got that meta pleasure . I was just standing there stiff as a board. I didn't even told her to stop touching me/rubbing me.





I admit to you that I kinda like to be publicly dominated by this creepy repulsive weirdo woman . It is an incredible feeling. This short skinny old ginger weird woman triggered/awakened this in me. I discovered this big part of me that wants someone to have power over me and take control of me.


It was kinda exciting. I just laughed uncomfortably. I enjoyed the experience and what an experience it was! It was incredibly freeing. People have seen it happen. It was not particularly crowded at the parking lot, probably about 10 people in sight, but I caught a few stares. I was humiliated by her. I was just standing there tall, still and silent in the middle of the parking lot, letting it happen. I'm submissive to this weird groper woman, but it is totally nonsexual. I love how physically weak this touchy feely woman is, and i let her to rub me and grope me in public. Why? I guess I'm into being dominated and being degraded. Am i a masochist?

 

[gbdare]

It happened again. Yesterday on my way home i stopped at the drugstore. I was wearing my purple satin belted trench long coat. This touchy feely ginger small woman was there. She was behind me in the line. She said to me "uuuu i love your coat. Big woman you are always so elegant. I like that you are always dressed up in satin and silk, i like touching your clothes. You are always so elegant and classy. " Then she started rubbing my back with her both hands as she was standing behind me in a line. On the parking lot she walked beside me, she was rubbing my lower back and my butt with her right hand. I tried to walk faster but i was on 5inch high heels. Then this weird ginger small woman gave me a side hug and she started rubbing my back and my butt with her left hand and with her right hand rubbing my whole front side for like 5 minutes in the middle of the parking lot while she was commenting on my coat . Her marauding hands were all over me, while she stared greedily with her creepy freckled lust-filled face. I just stood there speechless stiff as a board as people watched waiting for her to finish. Then she walked to her cousin's car.
Instead of outrage, i felt a strange, paralyzing shame, but also again i got that meta pleasure . I was just standing there stiff as a board. I didn't even told her to stop touching me/rubbing me.





I admit to you that I kinda like to be publicly dominated by this creepy repulsive weirdo woman . It is an incredible feeling. This short skinny old ginger weird woman triggered/awakened this in me. I discovered this big part of me that wants someone to have power over me and take control of me.


It was kinda exciting. I just laughed uncomfortably. I enjoyed the experience and what an experience it was! It was incredibly freeing. People have seen it happen. It was not particularly crowded at the parking lot, probably about 10 people in sight, but I caught a few stares. I was humiliated by her. I was just standing there tall, still and silent in the middle of the parking lot, letting it happen. I'm submissive to this weird groper woman, but it is totally nonsexual. I love how physically weak this touchy feely woman is, and i let her to rub me and grope me in public. Why? I guess I'm into being dominated and being degraded. Am i a masochist?

If you get sexual pleasure from being humiliated, then yes, you would fall under the definition of a masochist. Some masochists require physical pain for sexual gratification, but others are aroused by various forms of emotional domination and/or humiliation without physical pain. In the "vanilla" world, the terms sadist and masochist have somewhat negative connotations (and tend to be thought of in non-sexual terms), but in the kink world, they are simply words to describe the things that turn some people on. Masochism, as with any kink, is completely normal as long as it does not cause significant problems or disruption in your life. It sounds like you are starting to accept, and even enjoy this newly-discovered part of your sexuality and I'm glad that you don't seem to be as distressed by it as you were.

 

[Silvana 1975]

If you get sexual pleasure from being humiliated, then yes, you would fall under the definition of a masochist. Some masochists require physical pain for sexual gratification, but others are aroused by various forms of emotional domination and/or humiliation without physical pain. In the "vanilla" world, the terms sadist and masochist have somewhat negative connotations (and tend to be thought of in non-sexual terms), but in the kink world, they are simply words to describe the things that turn some people on. Masochism, as with any kink, is completely normal as long as it does not cause significant problems or disruption in your life. It sounds like you are starting to accept, and even enjoy this newly-discovered part of your sexuality and I'm glad that you don't seem to be as distressed by it as you were.

I admit to you that i secretly want to be dominated and publicly humiliated. I love it when others see me getting groped by this weird creepy small older ginger woman. I kinda like being dominated, i kinda like being humiliated by her in public. But i would never want to kiss a woman. I am very sexually attracted to men. I am literally 100% straight. I don't have lesbian tendencies. I find this weirdo groper ginger woman ugly and repulsive. She looks like a short skinny ugly effeminate man. But you are right. I enjoy the public humiliation, publicly being groped by this creepy weird midget woman. I enjoy the embarrassment. But i will never have sex and intimate relationship with her.


But there is something in submission... my choices being removed. For me it's just the fact that this old small woman is taking control of me. It's like I am a vessel, and for a little while I get to empty myself completely. To let go even of your own will... It's mind altering. I am aware that i am becoming this ginger weirdo woman groper's bitch, but i just like (need?) to be publicly rubbed by her. It is an incredible feeling. She is so dominant and invasive. This weirdo small ginger woman is publicly rubbing /groping me at every encounter. She is on me every chance she gets. This repulsive weirdo ginger woman doesn’t just touch me or grope me , but she always seem to be out to embarrass me somehow. She likes subtly humiliating me in front of people. This is a way for her to humiliate me in front of other people and gain power over me . Because a lot of people here in this community think that I'm stuck up upper middle class arrogant overdressed snob because I tend to ignore them. When i am in an environment where I do not know everyone I can come as arrogant and stuck up depending on the setting.Is truly a defensive mechanism though.I got the feeling that a lot of people here in this community think i am just arrogant snob.

 

[gbdare]

Attraction

I admit to you that i secretly want to be dominated and publicly humiliated. I love it when others see me getting groped by this weird creepy small older ginger woman. I kinda like being dominated, i kinda like being humiliated by her in public. But i would never want to kiss a woman. I am very sexually attracted to men. I am literally 100% straight. I don't have lesbian tendencies. I find this weirdo groper ginger woman ugly and repulsive. She looks like a short skinny ugly effeminate man. But you are right. I enjoy the public humiliation, publicly being groped by this creepy weird midget woman. I enjoy the embarrassment. But i will never have sex and intimate relationship with her.


But there is something in submission... my choices being removed. For me it's just the fact that this old small woman is taking control of me. It's like I am a vessel, and for a little while I get to empty myself completely. To let go even of your own will... It's mind altering. I am aware that i am becoming this ginger weirdo woman groper's bitch, but i just like (need?) to be publicly rubbed by her. It is an incredible feeling. She is so dominant and invasive. This weirdo small ginger woman is publicly rubbing /groping me at every encounter. She is on me every chance she gets. This repulsive weirdo ginger woman doesn’t just touch me or grope me , but she always seem to be out to embarrass me somehow. She likes subtly humiliating me in front of people. This is a way for her to humiliate me in front of other people and gain power over me . Because a lot of people here in this community think that I'm stuck up upper middle class arrogant overdressed snob because I tend to ignore them. When i am in an environment where I do not know everyone I can come as arrogant and stuck up depending on the setting.Is truly a defensive mechanism though.I got the feeling that a lot of people here in this community think i am just arrogant snob.

Attraction or lack thereof is irrelevant when the person activates your kink in some way. It's possible that you being repulsed by her actually makes the humiliation (and your arousal from it) even stronger. In other words, it might not be so humiliating if you were submitting to someone you were attracted to, but the fact that you completely give in to this disgusting woman makes it that much more of a humiliation and therefore deepens the arousal from it.

The fact that you believe a lot of people view you as an arrogant snob may actually intensify your reactions to being humiliated by that woman as well. Whether or not others actually view you that way doesn't really matter. In your mind, you may think they are enjoying seeing you "taken down a peg", and that potentially adds to your humiliation and how you get turned on by it.

Just as an aside, it's not my kink, but from what I understand there are quite a number of Dom-sub relationships in which the Dom and sub do not have sex with each other. I have a friend who is a submissive. His wife knows about and is understanding of his kink, but unfortunately is not very comfortable acting as a Dominant to him. So, he has sessions with a professional dominatrix, with his wife's knowledge and approval (and her input to the Dominatrix as to what is and isn't allowed). He doesn't have sex with the dominatrix (his wife would definitely not accept that!), he just acts as a submissive to her. He then goes home and has sex with his wife.

 

[Silvana 1975]

Attraction


Attraction or lack thereof is irrelevant when the person activates your kink in some way. It's possible that you being repulsed by her actually makes the humiliation (and your arousal from it) even stronger. In other words, it might not be so humiliating if you were submitting to someone you were attracted to, but the fact that you completely give in to this disgusting woman makes it that much more of a humiliation and therefore deepens the arousal from it.

The fact that you believe a lot of people view you as an arrogant snob may actually intensify your reactions to being humiliated by that woman as well. Whether or not others actually view you that way doesn't really matter. In your mind, you may think they are enjoying seeing you "taken down a peg", and that potentially adds to your humiliation and how you get turned on by it.

Just as an aside, it's not my kink, but from what I understand there are quite a number of Dom-sub relationships in which the Dom and sub do not have sex with each other. I have a friend who is a submissive. His wife knows about and is understanding of his kink, but unfortunately is not very comfortable acting as a Dominant to him. So, he has sessions with a professional dominatrix, with his wife's knowledge and approval (and her input to the Dominatrix as to what is and isn't allowed). He doesn't have sex with the dominatrix (his wife would definitely not accept that!), he just acts as a submissive to her. He then goes home and has sex with his wife.

You really get to a bottom of things. I admit to you that it kinda turns me on that this older ugly short skinny masculine ginger woman that would not even be anywhere near my league is so dominant and aggressive with me . So you are probably right. This woman groper is total opposite of me. Probably that is why i enjoy being dominated by her.
People around me (except for the ones who truly know me) have always said that I come across as snobby, stuck on myself, and unfriendly. I've been asked soooo many times 'why are you so serious' when I'm not feeling serious at that moment. I unintentionally tend to give off an unfriendly aura which has led people to ask if I dislike them. When I feel nervous I try to compensate by being really confident. I guess other people take that as me being arrogant. I've been told I come across as stuck up/snobby full of myself, narcissistic, stuck up etc., and also very unwelcoming to new people. When I do speak with new people, I tend to be overly nice to compensate and I guess that comes off as fake which definitely doesn't help the situation.


Everyone always gets that first impression of me, and many keep that impression. The vast majority of people think I'm a "snob" or a upper middle class overdressed arrogant bitch I know since the friends I've had over the years told me that after some time. People simply assume I must be a snob because I'm quiet. That doesn't even seem logical to me, but when being quiet is something that simply wouldn't occur to most people perhaps that's the next most logical conclusion.


I have been told that i look stuck up and arrogant.I have had the experience of women being jealous of me.I like satin and silk clothes and I wear them well.I should not have to suffer for what I like because other women have low self esteem and don't see the gifts they have within themselves.I have a more stylish sense of fashion. I never wear anything trashy, I keep myself well covered and strive for professionalism and class. I always like to dress on my best, because I also feel great when I am dressed pretty. Once, i'd been to the hairdressers and was off to do a little shopping afterwards and the girl at the salon asked where i was going looking so glamorous ? i said i was going shopping and she was like "really" You look so glammed up to be going shopping!" I don't mind though, i'd rather be wearing something i feel good in than look like i just rolled out of bed.I wear high heels every day too.All the time. I like dressing well, and looking presentable.
I have been told that I seem snobby and it is because I don't speak up in groups where I am not comfortable. I have had people ask me if I thought I was better than others. You are probably right. This explains my situation with this ginger touchy feely small woman.